October 19, 2007

Driving Lesson, Part 1

Hi there! This is the first installment of what would hopefully be only a five part series. To those of you who are familiar to the English language, you would probably guess its about my driving lessons. Had my first one today. Was introduced to the instrument that I will eventually be using to persuade the driving tester that I am not one to pay bribes.

The Kancil, (also known as the Daihatsu Ceria, but basically a re-badged Daihatsu Mira) was the first car to be launched by the local car company, Perodua which is shorthand for Perusahaan Otomobil Kedua Berhad (in English, Second Automobile Manufacturer Limited Corporation). With such an imaginative name for such an innovative company, you would expect the car to drive as brilliantly as the makers wanted it to. And indeed, it does handle like a mousedeer.

So, I set the time for my first class for 3pm. I figured, I could take the 2pm bus home, have enough time for a shower, before diving head first into the world of automobile commendeering. Thankfully however, my dad picked me up from school at 1, and without having to change busses, I arrived home at 1.30. Great, enough time for a shower AND lunch. And maybe a little light reading, maybe check my e-mails, stuff like that.

As a kiasu, I got ready and was on my house porch 15 minutes early. 3pm came and went. 3.10 came and went. 3.15pm, I decided to call him. "I'm on my way," he said, as if I didn't know that.

Don't you hate it when people who are late always respond with a "I'm almost there/I'm just entering the carpark/I was caught in a jam, but now I'm only 7 minutes away." Once you're late, I don't care where the heck you are. I just wanna know how much you value our friendship until you have the balls to tell me that you overslept. I could not be my Sociology teacher. I would have strangled many students before the police take me away. But I digress.

He did show up about 20 minutes late. I made a big fuss about checking the time, but he didn't notice it. Still, its probably better not to make the man angry. I entered the car and was greeted by a large toothy grin and the stale smell of tobacco. Great. A smoker. I wanna learn how to drive, not develop a bad case of emphysema.

We did most of my practice runs in the hills towards the inside of my residential area. That's fine. Barely anyone knows me there. But did my car had to stall coming out of the exact junction where my neighbour had bought his second house? "Hello uncle!" I said, sounding as if it was the most logical thing to do to stop the car in the middle of a road, attempting to restart the engine. "Having your first driving lesson?" he asked. However did you guess.

Mercifully I did get the engine started and was quickly on my way. When I say quickly, I mean speeds in excess of 20km/h. "We are really moving now!" said the instructor. I was slightly skeptical, as we were being overtaken by his cigarette smoke.

Being at the wheel of a car is an experience that is incomparable. Its is just so effortless. Push the pedals, and the car moves a bit. Push it some more, and the car goes faster. It make you want to just go a lot faster, push it into the high gear and floor it. It also encourages murderous thoughts in your head. "There goes my primary school teacher who made me do squats because my handwriting was so bad. Its a secluded area, and he has his back to me. Tempting.

2 hours of this, and 4 near misses later, he turned to me and said, "You are doing well for your first lesson. As your reward, you can drive home. What did you say? Drive from an area where I am relatively obscure, to my street where people recognise me? Where that house across the road practices badminton in the evenings? The road my neighbour takes long walks with his grandkids? Yeah. Sure.

I made it. With only 3 stalls, I managed to make it home without killing anyone. Hopefully part 2 will be better. I would love to see what this hunk of junk will do on the highway!

2 comments:

ikanbilis said...

i just love your writing. you know, you can be either a good author, an brilliant scriptwriter for Hollywood or an excellent sarcastic columnist!

i should prepare you a lovely birthday present!

cheers!

Anonymous said...

Ahahahaha! You have a smoker as your instructor, that is sooooo funny! At least you didn't have a car wreck on your first lesson. Gosh, your first lesson was longer than mine. Lucky, my first lesson of driving was only 30 minutes. : (