- Buy stock in WalMart
- Prove that global warming does not exist.
- Sell stock in WalMart.
- Invent a toaster that runs on coal, (only 18 grammes of coal to make four pieces of delicious crispy toast! Don't you just love that extra carbon kick?).
- Start a family, (including all the unprotected sex it involves).
- Develop a cure for apathy.
- Score over 150 in an online IQ test.
- Create a new cocktail.
- Appear on the cover of Fortune magazine.
- Win Nodel Peace prize.
May 25, 2007
Ten Things To Do Before I Die:
Below are the ten things I wish to do before I shuffle of my mortal coil and ascend (hopefully), to the financial capital in the sky.
May 23, 2007
In Me, We Trust
There is a very reasonable reason for me not updating my blog. As you probably know, (and if you don't, I'm not talking to you), I am a perfectionist. This post will be my 21st post. 20 is such a nice number, divisible by 2, 4, 5, 10, and 20. Any number divisible by 10 is a perfect number. Look it up. Now you might say, "I did look it up, and it was not true." Well, that’s because you looked it up in a book. I'm a man, we don't look in books. (My library back home is actually a collection of DVDs with fake book covers) It is stated in a book that a perfect number is a number that is the sum of all of its factors. That’s nonsense. How can 28, or 8128 be a perfect number? Do they look nice? Is that number able to scare the other numbers away? Would you bring her home to momma? Of course not!
Now this over-opinionated view about numbers might be a concern for someone who sees his future in finance. And it is. But to be extraordinary, we must be different. The way I see it, there are 3 ways of doing something. There's the right way, the wrong way, and my way. My closest friends can attest to this, my way is actually the wrong way, only you get results faster. and in this fast paced world, with its fast-food drive-through lines, time is a commodity that cannot be wasted and I strongly stand by this fact. I do not waste time with boring, unimportant acts like peeing, or breakfast.
Another plus as to why I am perfect for the world of finance is my adversity towards risk. Most people have the urge to place twice their liquid net worth on a football game as a way to jazz up the weekend, but not me. My mom can attest to that. I am the most scared person you will ever meet. I am the only one in my family who has not tasted pickles. It is because I am afraid it might be sour. When all of my friends had a paintball fight, I was hiding in a bush next to the first-aid building. In this volatile world when companies can pay their CEOs $400,000 in stock options one day, and begin selling their water coolers the next, (see, Southwest and MediCor), it is important for a manager to not be overly ambitious. Since that’s the case, I'm the man for the job.
Another important trait a good manager should have is emotional stability. I have that.
Job security is also important. As of now, I have no personal fortune to speak of. That is why, it is assured, whatever position is offered to me, I will take it and stick to it, (at least until another job that offers better pay, an expence account and a company car is offered). I will take the job offered because we should always accept any job offered right out of college. We can always quit later. Nothing looks worse on a resume then nothing. (I make good coffee. Call me.)
A manager needs to be decisive. It is that reason why I am deciding to end this post now.
Now this over-opinionated view about numbers might be a concern for someone who sees his future in finance. And it is. But to be extraordinary, we must be different. The way I see it, there are 3 ways of doing something. There's the right way, the wrong way, and my way. My closest friends can attest to this, my way is actually the wrong way, only you get results faster. and in this fast paced world, with its fast-food drive-through lines, time is a commodity that cannot be wasted and I strongly stand by this fact. I do not waste time with boring, unimportant acts like peeing, or breakfast.
Another plus as to why I am perfect for the world of finance is my adversity towards risk. Most people have the urge to place twice their liquid net worth on a football game as a way to jazz up the weekend, but not me. My mom can attest to that. I am the most scared person you will ever meet. I am the only one in my family who has not tasted pickles. It is because I am afraid it might be sour. When all of my friends had a paintball fight, I was hiding in a bush next to the first-aid building. In this volatile world when companies can pay their CEOs $400,000 in stock options one day, and begin selling their water coolers the next, (see, Southwest and MediCor), it is important for a manager to not be overly ambitious. Since that’s the case, I'm the man for the job.
Another important trait a good manager should have is emotional stability. I have that.
Job security is also important. As of now, I have no personal fortune to speak of. That is why, it is assured, whatever position is offered to me, I will take it and stick to it, (at least until another job that offers better pay, an expence account and a company car is offered). I will take the job offered because we should always accept any job offered right out of college. We can always quit later. Nothing looks worse on a resume then nothing. (I make good coffee. Call me.)
A manager needs to be decisive. It is that reason why I am deciding to end this post now.
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